Step 1.2 The “Bakti” Talk (With Your Parents)

DATE 2: The Reality Check (With Your Parents)

The Goal: Reality Check. Are you their retirement plan?

This is the hardest conversation in Asian culture. Asking your parents about money feels disrespectful. But if you don’t ask now, you have no plans, and when a medical emergency happens, it will destroy your entire financial plan.

The Script: Don’t say: “Ma, do you have money?” (Too rude). Say: “Ma, Pa, I just read about a lot of scams targeting retirees. I want to make sure you are protected. Can we look at your paperwork together so I know where everything is, just in case?”

The Checklist:

1. The Medical Card This is the single most critical question.

  • Question: “Do you have a medical card? Is it active? What is the annual limit?”
  • The Reality: Government hospitals are great, but queues are long. If your dad needs a knee replacement and the queue is 6 months, you will pay RM20k at a private hospital out of your own pocket if he has no insurance.   
  • Action: If they don’t have one and are too old/sick to get one, you need to start a “Medical Sinking Fund” for them immediately. Contact your insurance agent to get a quote for an affordable plan for your parents based on your budget.

2. The Scams Elderly Malaysians are prime targets for “Macau Scams” and “Love Scams.”

  • Action: Check their phone settings. Install a caller ID app like Whoscall. Remind them: “If someone calls saying they are LHDN or Police, hang up. Call me.”

3. The “Bakti” Budget (Allowance) In our culture, giving money to parents is an honor. But it must be sustainable.

  • The Formula: Total Income – (Your Taxes + EPF + Needs) = Surplus.
  • You cannot give what you do not have. Agree on a fixed monthly amount that you transfer automatically. Treat it like a bill. Do not feel guilty if you cannot give more. Your first duty is to not become a burden to your children.

Your Homework:

  1. Schedule the “Tea Time” with your parents for the weekend.
  2. Understand their financial situation.
  3. Order a Kopi Kurang Manis. You’re going to need the caffeine.

Continue to Step 2